What is wrong with this guy!?

Am I being reasonable? ( read first post )

  • Hell no!! Let the man use your stuff!!

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • I wouldnt do it, but its your kit.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • You are being completely reasonable. People should supply their own stuff.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters


New member
So I am playing a show within the next few weeks and the drummer on a band that I am playing with has decided to voice his opinion on bringing his own kit.

APPARENTLY he is expecting me to allow him to use my kit..without really asking me.

After deliberation, I decided that to make this show as smooth as possible ( considering im putting it together for a school project ) I told him that he could use the drums and pedals. He has to supply his own cymbals and snare drum.

Reasonable? Or am I being a douchebag?

- Sean


New member
I've supplied my kit for a lot of drummers playing on the same bill as my band. I always specify that if anything is broken that the person that breaks it, buys it. With that said, I make it known that to avoid breaking the things that are most commonly/easily broken (ie. cymbals, snare head) that it is best that people only plan to share the toms, bass drum, and hardware. I encourage other bands to bring their own Snare drum, Cymbals, and Kick Pedal.

Its great to be the nice guy at a gig, but being the nice guy all the time is how you become a pushover.

It's good you are looking out for yourself. You shouldn't feel bad about it at all.


New member
This is the situation for a ton of shows when your band has an opener. just talk to him before hand and tell him he is responsible for anything of yours he breaks. but telling him to brings pedals, cymbals, even his snare and throne is totally resonable

Call me Gideon

New member
While its unreasonable for him to plan on using your kit without talking to you first, its not all that unreasonable to do a gear share set up. Playing in small clubs where time is limited it really helps with set up and break down times. Usually its understood that each drummer brings his own cymbals, pedals and snare. However...not ALL drummers get that...talk to the guy beforehand and tell him what he can use and what he needs to supply or youll get that guy that walks in with nothing but the clothes on his back...not even a pair of sticks...expecting to use all your stuff!


New member
I never assume that someone is going to let me use their kit; mine is always in the back of my van and ready to go at a moment's notice. However, when you have a quick turnaround between bands, it's always cool to share a kit.

Some tips on sharing a kit-
~If it's a pain to change something, just don't. Try and deal with it.
~Try to use your own cymbals and snare drum. If you can use your own pedal, do that. That way no one can call you 3 weeks later asking about the "cracks in their ride cymbal that were not there 3 weeks ago".
~If you break a head, it's a decent thing to replace that head. If the head was on the verge of breakage, then that needs to be brought up beforehand. Even then, offer to pay half.
~If you're a lefty that needs to switch a kit (or a righty playing a lefty kit) then try to be a low-impact as possible.
~Leave your water-spitting tricks for your own kit.

Other'n that, that should make everyone happy.


New member
I've been in a lot of situations like that...(especially when we were usually the last band to play).

I really never cared if someone else used my kit as long as they used their own sticks.

Most of the drummers weren't animals...(that I knew of), and I wasn't worried if a cymbal broke or a head busted. If it did.....I figured it was just "it's time" -and probably would have broke anyway if I would have been playing it.

I guess common courtesy is the bottom line - - - But please use your own sticks,


New member
YELLOW_TOAD":1dv1k3yu said:
I guess common courtesy is the bottom line - - - But please use your own sticks,
If someone is lame enought to not have their own sticks, and it's happened, offer to sell them a pair.

I'm weird about that kind of stuff- that person's DNA is going to be forever infused in the wood, so I don't have any use for that pair of sticks from there on out.


New member
When I was on the road, I used to open for alot of headliners and use the headliners' drums. But I had to use my own snare, pedals, and cymbals - standard road rules. It is hard to tell when a cymabl gets broken because the evidence appears long after the damage has been done.


New member
You're not being unreasonable at all. To me, the cymbals are the biggest issue, as if they break, that is usually the biggest replacement expense you will see. And you WILL get the argument that it was already cracked or something. Unless you know the other drummer is a really hard-hitter, I don't think I"d mind if he wanted to use the snare. Any breakage needs to be discussed up front and understood that it is the borrower's responsibility to take care of that.

As far as pedals go, man, I can't imagine using someone else's bass drum pedal. It seems to me to be a central part of the feel of a kit, and a very personal thing as far as how it's set up for the player. Even if someone wanted me to use their BD pedal, I think I would pass.

Btw, not bringing your own sticks... how lame is that?


New member
YELLOW_TOAD":1kzvuufh said:
Most of the drummers weren't animals...(that I knew of), and I wasn't worried if a cymbal broke or a head busted. If it did.....I figured it was just "it's time" -and probably would have broke anyway if I would have been playing it.
if someone besides me breaks my cymbals they will owe me the full cost of a new one. when i play a cymbal for years and someone else comes out and breaks it in a matter of an hour there are some serious issues with that guys playing. ive decided to use proper technique to prolong the life of everything i own and since i dont abuse my equipment ill definately consider it the other guys fault. cymbals dont have to break (contrary to popular belief) and with proper playing they wont. thats why no one is going to use my cymbals. im fine with people using my drums, hardware, pedals, and even throne (i played a battle of the bands where the entire set was played on my cobras, by every band) but cymbals are their own business.


New member
No one should use your kit live, every drummer or band should supply there own kit. All drummers who play live should think about what they will need before even turning up at a gig... for example if you have already sorted out another kit.. then you take 2 single kick pedals and a double pedal version of your single pedals... A snare drum, cymbals, a throne, plus any hardware liek cymbal stands that you mite need.. plus spare parts for all of yourgear incase any of it breaks.

Only let people you can trust on your kit and wont hammer the shit out of it. People who play as hard as they can cannot play drums properly. End of story.


New member
i wouldnt let him use my stuff either, to may drummers have incorrect teqnique that can really damage your drums to let them use them.


New member
My issue would not necessarily be someone else playing my kit but more with the fact that they expected to. If someone made the assumption that I was going to put my kit at their mercy and they didn't have the respect to ask then I would have to give them the old (Are you F***ing retarded?) look and tell them that they are on their own. Now if there is the respect of them asking and I know that they are responsible....well that's different. I also agree with drummers2k, if they break it they buy it!!


New member
Having done quite a few shows on the very amateur level, I would say you are being totally reasonable, but beware with regards to what you say to him because if he hasn't spoken to you liklihood is hes been told "drummer sez you can use his stuff its fine" and you have been told "yeh he sez u must lend him your stuff" and wires get crossed blah blah

With regards to stuff getting broke, you are being reasonable, god knows what hes like lol. I've played shows with one kid who had been playing for like 3 weeks and lent him my snare/pedals and had no probs becos he was harmless, then one kid who had been playing for 4 years and thought it would be brutal to just beat the living crap out of everything in arms reach, needless to say I was more worried about my stuff with the latter.


New member
You're a brave man letting some one else use your kit. I wouldn't. Maybe I'm an ass hole, but I hate it when other people use my set. I'm not sure why. Well, put it this way, you wouldn't let someone else bone your woman, even if they brought their own trojan condom and KY lube would you?

That was a horrible comparison I know, but that's just how I feel. :x


New member
Interesting replies.

Here's my final take- Sometimes, it's not practical to switch out drumkits after every act. If thet is the case, the promoter of the show should arrange for a "backline kit" to be available and everyone has to use (suffer) it.

It is NEVER OK for another bandmember to say "I told the other band they could use your drums".When someone volunteers my stuff, I bill out at $100/hr and I WILL get it, otherwise my drums and me go home. If someone thought it was wise to tacitly offer up MY property without consult, then I feel as if I am due my fee. The drums are free! It's my TIME in waiting around to collect them that costs.

If ever you should find yourself on someone's kit, bring your own sticks, cymbals, BD pedal, and snare if you can. At the least, use your own sticks and cymbals.
i don't mind letting someone use my kit IF:

1. it's worked out in advance. (don't NOT bring a kit to a show and expect someone will let you borrow theirs)

2. i know you.

3. you bring your own sticks, cymbals and snare.

4. you pay for anything you break or damage.

i may sound like i'm being a jerk, but i stopped letting people i don't know use my stuff.

these were the guys that always seemed to dent my heads, not bring sticks or cymbals, adjust my stands after i told them not to...

i guess the way i look at it is that i didn't work hard and spend thousands of dollars on gear so some schlub too lazy to bring his gear can rock it on some nice equipment.

Steven McTowelie

New member
i don't think you're being unreasonable at all. i've played shows with a shared kit and have experiences with that being good and bad. i can't help but think he's the one being a little unreasonable with assuming that he'll be using your kit. anytime i've played a show where i've shared my kit or shared someone else's, it was always talked about beforehand. nothing was ever just assumed.


New member
I voted that you are completely reasonable.

I've actually been the guy that asks to use other people's kits. There were a few times when i didn't have access to a vehicle that could carry my kit, or even a car of my own, and my kit was located waaaay out of the way, when i asked some of the bands playing if they'd be okay with me using their kit.

I told them ahead of time i'd be 100% responsible for anything that broke, and i'd bring my own sticks, but if it was out of the question or if there was anything they wouldn't want me to use, i said i'd bring my own instead. the key thing here is to not mention why you can't bring your own kit. if you make up some sob story and guilt-trip them into making it easier for you, you put pressure on them like that to say yes, then it makes you a douche.

that's my opinion.

but i've also let others use my kit, and i have the same rules anyone else here has mentioned: we'll look over everything beforehand, and whatever breaks, you pay for some or all of it's replacement. no problems!

don't be a pushover, though.


New member
It seems like more people get it now than a few months ago. The last post of this sort was full of "nobody touches my pearl exports" etc. etc.....Get over it. Here is my modus operandi, for those interested:

If borrowing-

Always ask beforehand if possible. If not, then I bring my kit too, just in case.

Use own snare, cymbals, and sticks, of course, but also use own snare stand, pedals, and throne (different people like different heights/adjustments, I just find that this makes things easier.)

Don't adjust/move anything. Deal with it.

If someone is using my kit-

Tell them to bring their own snare, cymbals and sticks and whatever else they think they might need.

Tell them not to adjust anything. When my band gets onstage, I want to know that everything is where it should be. Also, I set my tom kind of low, so if someone tried to move it, it would probably rub the kick drum.

If you break it, you bought it.