Please help! my band =(

I Wear Emericas

New member
Well in a nut shell, we're the opposite of "nsync" My family keeps saying I'm getting worked up about nothing much at all. This wont be what I'm doing for the rest of my life and really, I know that. But it doesnt mean I dont love music and want to play it for as long as I can.
Here's the problem, we've only got 3 people. 2 guitarist and myself on drums. We're currently looking for bass and vocals really cause no one other then myself will settle for a 3 or 4 manband. Anyway, I think I do my part well. Not to down my band at all but I've just been playing longer and I have my part down. Well today at practice(we've only had two so what can you expect...) I learned EXACTLY what they told me to. My part and everything. They really...didn't. So we tried to take it from the top. Didn't happen. My rhythem guitarist was all off and drums are in time with him. He just didnt follow me.
I've been told we're biting off more than we can chew. We're starting with (Atreyu, Silverstein and Bayside) Stuff I can play, but I'm just worried about them. So my question is how can we fix our problem? Do I just have to take charge and be a woman!? Haha, I'm out of ideas. I think these boys just want to be people they aren't. =/

Thanks for the help. And any input would be VERY helpful.


New member
ive been in a smilar situation. ive been in a few bands that wanted to do thrash and speed metal. all kinda heavy stuff. so i learned my stuff and they didnt do more than the main riff. its hard to get in a band where everybody does their job right. i recomend talkin to them about it. sometimes you just got to find yourself musicians that are willing to work as hard as you are at the music you want to make.


New member
Serious problem. If they aren't committed then you should tell them that either they practice as hard as you do and give it effort or you'll go on craigslist and find a new group of musicians to play with. One look at a community site and you will see the demand for drummers is huge. Don't waste your time with people who won't put in the same effort you will.


New member
first off, in a band no one should have to take charge when it comes to not learning parts. everyone in the band should do their part in practicing at home and learning their part. you guys just need to all sit down and talk out what needs to be done. you all WILL NOT agree on everything. that where you have to compromise to make everyone happy. but when it comes to a member just not learning parts and being able to play them at rehersal is something that needs to be taken care of. a band can only be as good as their weakest member. and remember that they need to understand that you each practice at home and rehears as a band.

and as for the members thing, its not about somone wanting a cirtain number of people, its about what you need for the music you will be playing. having 2 guitarists in a band where both match each other the whole time is pointless. one guitarist could run 2 amps and get the same effect. the guitarist in my one band blends a marshall jcm 2000, a mesa boogie triple rectifier, and a line 6 through 2 marshall 4x10 cabs and people have told us we have a fuller sound than most 5 piece bands with just the 3 members we have. so dont base how many members by what someone things would look cool. go by what will work with your music the best.


New member
You will not believe how close your situation is linked to mine at the moment.

In my band its me (Drums) and my 2 Guitarists (Rhythm and Lead) We are also looking for a bass player and a vocalist.
The best thing to do to sort things out is to just sit them both down and all 3 of u talk about what u have to do. If things aint locking properly with the music, focus on what your doing wrong (or your guitarists wrongs).


New member
Different people have different priorities. You can lead a horse to water....but you can't make him learn his parts!

Best thing to do- have fun and don't take it so seriously. There's plenty of people that are as committed as you and maybe you'll find them. I hope so, because you get that right chemistry and you've developed musical friends for life.

I have friends thatI have played with for close to 20 years now and it's like sitting down and having a conversation when we get together. Music is conversational in it's nature and as long as you get people who speak "on your level" then you'll have fun.


New member
drum man":3ilpr6wz said:
if there realy good friends of yours be patient and they'll come around.
And that's what is best. If you are in this for the camraderie and friendship, then by all means encourage them, help them, and at the same time you help yourself.

However, if you are "on a mission" then always check out other avenues and other players.

Either way, always be nice....Sheesh I should learn to follow my own advice. ) I'm trying....really I are!!


New member
*sigh* My band also lacks a basist and vocalist...what is it with these kids nowadays? All the basist's we ever get around here that are half decent are the ska/reggae influenced ones. Might just be where I live :?


New member
Hate to say it, but if they're telling you to learn stuff, then you do learn it and they didn't bother to learn it themselves, then you should consider trying to find another group to rock with. If this is still going, then you should defeinitely do that.

In my experience, a band doesn't work well if the entire band is 100% gung-ho about doing their part and playing music. If it gets to the point where a single person is needed to "take charge" and "whip them into shape," it's usually hopeless by then, and those people will never change.

Tell them you're going to find new people to play with, that it's not working out for them. Later, if they get their shit together and you still want to play with those guys, give them another shot and see if they've found the motivation.


New member
I feel like the main thing is to all have the same goals with the band and all be focused on acheiving that goal. If everyone is not on the same page then some adjustments need to be made. If adjustments don't work then the word replacement comes into play. It's not always fun but if you are serious about making the best of your situation then you just have to step up.


New member
Haha, gotta love these situations mate, I can identify slighty, tho my problem was always the hyper committed guitarist vs the laid back chilled out guitarist (ironically now the one who is going to Brighton Institute of Modern Music to study guitar diploma).

Best thing to do is lay it out there I reckon, communications key. Tell them you think they aren't pulling their weight and you are trying your hardest and its not coming off. Also 1) make them unplug and you just tap some table or something (makes it easier to work out whats going wrong) and
2) don't damage their egos, a guitarists ego is only second to his actual guitar in terms of life lol. I have heard atreyu and its hardly the easiest starter song. We began with Paranoid (black sabbath one riff wonder) and worked up, perhaps this might also help?

Good luck!